I Don't Think So
by Bellantara
Summary: The WEP producers visit Arus to get the team's approval of their new Voltron Force series. And get more than they expect. . . .


A/N: Just a bit of silliness I came up with after watching The Awesome Cadets Show—I mean Voltron Force—last night. Usual disclaimers apply.

Lance strolled into the conference room, late as usual. The WEP producers at the end of the table looked up in annoyance; Keith gave him a glare that promised retribution later. "Well, now that Commander McClain is here, we can get started," the head producer said nervously. Two of his assistants passed out stacks of scripts to the five Voltron Force members and Sven. "We want to revive Voltron for a new audience," he lectured as they began to look the scripts over. "The people who grew up watching you are now in their late 30s and early 40s; we want to introduce you to their children. What you have before you are a selection of scripts from the first two seasons that have already been written. Look them over, and give us your opinions; the first one airs in a few weeks." Lance grabbed a stack and tilted his chair back against the wall on two legs as they all started to read.

Keith and Allura both looked up sharply after just a couple of pages. "_Green _eyes?" she asked. "_Blue eyes? _I can live with my hair being cut, but come on!" Keith protested. "I'm Japanese, for Kami's sake!"

Hunk and Pidge grumbled to themselves, apparently not liking what they were reading, but not yet seeing anything specific to complain about.

Sven had flipped through several scripts and finally pushed away from the table. "I don't know vhy you insisted on hafing me here," he said dryly. "Since you didn't boter to include me in dis show of yours. At least Golion had the decency to kill me honestly." He nodded to his friends and slipped out of the room.

Everyone's heads turned as Lance's chair came down with a thump. The producers went pale at the thunderous look on the Red pilot's face. "You're all missing the point," he said quietly. "WE aren't the stars of this show. Look at your scripts again. Apparently, this show is about three teenagers, cadets, that we are training. We're just the supporting cast." He glared at the producers. "Where the hell do I start with this bullshit? First, how the hell does Allura have a niece when she's an ONLY FUCKING CHILD? Second, are you kidding me? Three teenagers, maybe 14 years old, and they're the EQUALS OF US? They can fly the Lions as well as WE CAN? For fuck's sake, this girl you've got in here can hold her own in hand to hand next to KEITH? _I_ can barely do that, and I've trained and fought with him for fifteen years." He tossed his last script on the table and got to his feet. "Find some other patsies for this crap; I'm NOT playing backup to a bunch of Mary Sues with God-like tendencies." He strode from the room without a backward glance.

The other force members flipped through their scripts, eyes growing wider. "What the hell!" Pidge finally exclaimed. "You've got a kid who's never been on Arus, who has the ability to manipulate the Lions and magically repair them? And, at the risk of being politically incorrect, he's an African-American descendant of the Arusian builders of Voltron. When there ARE no African-Americans on Arus." He stood up. "Lance is right, this is a bunch of garbage. Count me out too." He started to walk out, then paused and turned back, tears in his eyes. "And it's damned cruel to bring Balto back when I sat in Green's cockpit and watched it blow up." He ran out.

Hunk looked up, scowling. "What Pidge said is bad enough. But you seem to have ignored EVERYTHING we ever knew about Voltron. You CAN'T form Voltron with only four Lions; we almost died more than once because of that particular plot point. And don't get me started on five different Voltrons. To hell with this; I'm gone." He shoved away from the table and followed his teammates.

The producers were left gaping at Keith and Allura. "Captain, Princess, I—" the head producer began, only to be cut off by Keith.

"My team was pretty blunt, but they're absolutely right. I won't participate in this travesty either. Did you even LOOK at the original show, or just pick and choose what you wanted?" He stood and looked at Allura. "Princess, I'm sorry, but I stand with the team."

"So do I." Allura got to her own feet. "Gentlemen, I'm sorry you came all this way, and I'm sorry you wasted so much time and effort. If this airs with any of our names and characters attached, you may be assured that our lawyers will be in touch with you. Good day." She walked out with Keith, leaving the stunned producers gaping.

"Well," one of the assistants finally said nervously. "Maybe we can rework it and use Robotech?"


End file.
